Happy New Year everybody!! I know it is sooo belated but heck, it is still January ;)
My resolution this year is NOT to have any resolutions. December 2009 was not a good month for me and the rest of my family members. We lost our beloved mum on 6th December, 2009 after struggling not more than 3 weeks of battle with Lung Cancer and Brain Tumor stage 4. It was a short, hectic and crazy 3 weeks i must say full with mixed emotions.
Denial... yes, we will always be in denial. I have not come to terms with my mum's passing. No, i have never referred to her as my "Late Mum", i still refer her as Mum... talk about denial. Tears of sadness... almost every other day ever since. Be it in the car, while reciting Yassin, before going to bed... you name it, i have done it all. I am happy that she did not have to go through the pain and suffering but i miss her, ALOT! I can still see her in her kitchen, in her room and everywhere. I can still hear her voice calling my name, scolding me or calling Aydin.
Aydin is feeling the absence more lately. He had fever a couple of days ago. Later at night, he requested to call Tokku (my dad). For the first time ever, i hear him actually had a proper conversation a the phone. He told Tokku he wanted to "sleep Tokku" (sleep with Tokku). Then he asked, "Mana Wen?" I am sure Dad had trouble answering that question. Then Aydin said, "Wen sakit, Aydin sakit". "Wen pegi mana?". "Mana Moksu?" (Moksu = my sis, Ezu). "Wen ikut Moksu." So after a 5-min conversation, he hung up. Later, he asked me again "Nak cakap Wen" (nak call and cakap phone dengan Wan). I was stumped. He used to ask to speak to Mum whenever he misses her. I didn't know what to do so i told him the usuals "Wen sakit. Wen pegi jalan-jalan jumpa Allah". Then he asked again, "Please mummy, nak cakap Wen". My heart was broken into pieces. How can i heal his pain of missing his Wen? So i repeated the same statement and tried to make him understand that his Wen is not around anymore.
I hope Aydin understand and not confusing the concept of "sakit" with death. He saw his Wen for the last time before we brought her to the hospital. Aydin salam and kissed Wen for the last time before she left for the hospital and i saw a smile on her face. He knew Wen sakit. I was sick last week. I had a very bad diarhea and threw up in front of Aydin. Aydin was worried when i was sick. He kept on asking, "Mummy sakit?". "Mummy sakit apa?". "Mummy tunggu ye. Nanti Ayah pegi doctor beli ubat mummy" with worried look on his face and in his voice. Luckily he did not see me in the hospital when i had drip tube attached to me. Luckily it was a short visit and i did not want to admit myself. To my surprise, he told everyone in his school that mummy was sick. His teacher asked Ayah if mummy was ok, that was how we found out. Eversince then, he will remind me every night before we go to bed that he wants mummy to send him to school. This is probably a way for him to ensure that mummy is ok. He is supper-attached to me lately. I tried to persuade him to sleep in the "boys room" with Arif but later he came into my room to check on me. Yesterday he told me, "tak nak boys room, nak mummy's room". He will sleep next to me, make sure he hugs me and i hug him properly neck-to-neck sometimes it suffocates me. He treated me like i am fragile. Arif is not allowed to hit me or hurt me or he will scold Arif. Even Ayah is not allowed to touch me. If he says something wrong or did anything wrong that will make me angry, he will quickly say "Sorry mummy".
Aydin is a very loving and caring boy. I hope he will grow up and stay that way. i will try not to spoil him and make him the typical "Mummy's boy" :)
I am feeling melancholy and blaming it on the BCP Yasmin i was taking hahaha...
Have fun people!!
A lot has been happening in our lives in one week. Mum was diagnosed with lung cancer and brain tumor last Thursday. Mum being mum has accepted the news calmly. Everyone in the family is also struggling to accept the news and adapt to the whole changes in our lives. hubby has been very supportive and i really appreciate his presence whenever i need it. I am also grateful to be blessed with friends and relatives who has endlessly offer support and help.
The questions everyone has been asking us: how did it happened, any symptoms etc. I will address this later in my upcoming entry. Today i would like to share with you our story for today. This is not meant to ask for sympathy or gloat on anything. I am merely sharing my experience with friends and relatives who has gone or probably going through the similar situation.
Today everyone is celebrating Eidul Adha. I am thankful to Allah for giving this opportunity to celebrate it with my mum. I hope this will not be the last Eid with mum. While everyone was busy getting ready to perform solah Eidul Adha, we were busy panicking trying to take mum to the clinic. I was woken by mum's voice calling for dad. "dad, mum koyak ni". My first thought was some papers ke koyak then i heard dad panicked voice. I jumped off the bed and checked out what has happened. Mum had a big cut on her lil pinky. Blood was everywhere, dripping on the floor, prayer mat, bed, mum's clothes. Mum claimed that she fell somewhere and cut her finger. I called Ezu for help. It was a good decision though because i forgot i have a phobia towards blood. The moment Ezu came up, i left the room and lied down. I almost fainted with the sight of blood. Note to everyone: i am the last person you would call if there is a lot of blood. I might not be able to help but instead i might cause you more problem ;)
we took mum to the nearest and her favorite clinic in USJ. Doctor Loo assessed her situation and stitched her pinky. It was a big cut and she might lost a small sensation on the tip of her right pinky. doctor referred her to a specialist incase we need further assessment. Now, we are here at UM hospital emergency area waiting for a doctor to see mum. Her pinky is still bleeding and the wait is still long. I suspected mum was trying to look at pictures with broken frame and glass that was put away in her room. Bibik saw traces of blood around that perimeter. Mum must have accidentally cut her finger while trying to lift the picture up. She could not or probably embarassed to admit what happened. This is just one of a few beginnings of her new challenge. Please Allah make her stronger and reduce her challenges and sufferrings.
I am (so-not) counting the days before i turn 23. The only good side of having another birthday is you get birthday gifts. Nowadays with facebook you will think everyone remembers your birthday which is actually a nice feeling. The actual fact is FB has done a very good job in reminding your friends that your birthday is coming up. So does this thought counts? :)
Anyway, this birthday is just like any other year. The only difference is how you celebrate it and who actually celebrates it with you? And this year it is no more Ramadhan birthday for me yeay! Another bonus for this year's birthday is what i will be getting as my birthday gift... double yeay! No, i am not going to disclose the gifts but i can assure you that it is different and it is definitely going to make me happy. I guess i deserve to be happy on my birthday? Kepada sesiapa yang berkenaan, Thank you very the much in advance and i love you too!!! hahaha... ala-ala nak buat dedication tapi shy-shy cat. Ada macam orang baru nak bercinta tak? ;)
On the other hand, i have also been doing alot of thinking lately. How i wish life could be simpler like when you were in High School. No committments, no heavy decisions to make, no bills to pay, no bosses to please and no obligations. Those were the times when you can fall in love and leave whenever you please hehehe... you can use the house phone and your parents pay the bills (dulu takde the luxury of handphones unlike kids today), you can forget about homework and the only thing you need to worry is kena marah dengan cikgu and if you don't like the position in the extra-curricular activity you can just resign but you will still get your allowance from your parents LoL (note: please remind me again about this blog when my kids are teenagers). No matter how naughty your (note: naughty tau not bad), everyone will still love you. No hearts were broken or shattered into pieces. How time flies... and now i am an adult, a wife and a mother to 2 brats :) I am not complaining. I love my boys to pieces!!
So di bulan Ramadhan ini, marilah kita bermaaf-maafan dan meminta ampun atas segala salah dan silap mahupun yang besar ataupun yang kecil. Mari kita bermuhasabah diri... terasa macam ucapan kat asrama penuh dulu jerk ngeh ngeh ngeh. To all:
OK i am guilty of not completing the last entry and i don't think i will ever do so LoL. Being a mother of two active boys, i have probably forgotten half of the details to share.
The title of this entry has got nothing to do with a 3rd bub coming or anything close to it though hubby said we could probably give that name to the 3rd one because God is great. DO NOT ask me why he said that because i am clueless as well. I told him i want the next one to be a girl as i am tired of being the only female in the family, Insya-Allah. Production house is temporarily closed for maintenance :)
Anyway, just wanted to share a short story of how Mohamad Aris Eidlan "came" into the picture. To those who has been hanging around Aydin alot, you'd noticed that he calls his younger brother ARIS instead of ARIF. Beats me why he refuses to call the proper name, Arif. Aydin has a mind of his own and he will call you whatever he wants to call you i.e: Moksu = Atu, Aeroplane = Aki, Aya Pin = Bear. Lately i noticed he has grew out of this habit and is able to call the names properly except for ARIF.
Today i received the new and "improved" ING medical card (though i can hardly spot the difference. They must have done a GOOD job) and i have 5 cards instead of 4 (Syawa, Fahmi, Aydin and Arif) but instead i have an extra child called Mohamed Aris Eidlan :) Yes, i spelled it correct ARIS, how ironic is that? And the most ironic thing is hubby and i were contemplating on naming Arif either Aris or Alif. I kinda like the name Aris for whatever reason so i guess Arif was supposed to be Aris kekeke....
So that's the story of Mohamed Aris Eidlan bin Mohamad Fahmi.
Disneyland Day 2 (we took the promo buy 1 day pass get another day free)
It was also our last day in Disney Hollywood hotel, Thank God! We're running out of cash & credit in the credit card (esp. hubby) because food was so darn expensive. I should have known and should have tapau-ed the big gallon of mineral water bottles and more instant food (not that we ran out of instant noodles or Brahim's tee-hee). The small bottled water cost around HKD12 (approx. RM6) and our family of four drinks alot and i try to maintain a good supply of water so that the kids won't get dehydrated. The hotel only provide 2 small mineral water bottles a day so yours truly pun had to boil the water and recycle the mineral bottles though i know it is not very healthy to do so. So friends, if you are going to stay at Disney hotel though you are going straight from the airport, i advice you to stop by at 7-Eleven or any convenient stores at the airport and get a good supply of water and drinks. I am sure the taxi driver would not mind the "extra" luggage.
We took our time since we were not rushing so we left the hotel around noon when everybody was done with their 'business' and everything was nicely packed. We left our luggages at the concierge and so we continued our adventure into Adventureland! But first we took the Train and checked out the whole Disneyland (not that it was big pun) in 10 mins? Later, we missed the 12p.m show so we went for 3p.m Lion King show. It was a good live musical show and i was glad Aydin behaved himself. I gave him a packet of Oreos to keep him happy for a while hoping that the experience of Madagascar 2 will not happened again ;) Surprisingly, Aydin enjoyed the show as well and joined the crowd cheering and clapping while Arif was tired and sleepy and afraid of the loud noise. I BF'ed Arif until he fell asleep and everyone got to enjoy Lion King.
Next we decided not to go up and visit Tarzan at his tree house. Not while carrying Arif on my two shoulders, no way! We decided to just take a ride on the river boat that went through a river full of crocodiles, elephants, gorillas and we also saw an erupted volcano. Don't worry, none of them were alive ;)
Hubby and i were already tired of Disney and Aydin was already asleep on the stroller. I wanted to get some souviniers and i saw a deal 2 items for HKD100 the day before and surprise-surprise, you can never find it when you really want to get it. While trying to look for it in every store, the rain started pouring and poor Arif who was on my back kena hujan. We didn't have any umbrella (because mummy was procastinating before the trip) and Aydin was cozily sleeping under the stroller's hood oblivious to what's happening. I didn't find the deal and just got myself a HKD120 Mickey cap.
This entry is incomplete. I could not find a nice time to spill out my story but i hope it will not be outdated and too late to tell the story later. Sorry... I will try to do this a.s.ap :(
Here i am trying to continue on my 2nd episode of our Hong Kong Trip while munching on some Kuaci. It has been a while since i had kuacis ;)
Day 2:
Before we start on day 2, i forgot to write out a very funny story on Aydin. Before we went to bed, lights out and all because Arif was already asleep before everyone else Aydin was still watching Disney channel. Suddenly Aydin was angry and screaming asking for Disney channel. I was annoyed because i did not want the noise to wake Arif up so i scolded hubby because i thought he changed the channel (he always does this to Aydin just to annoy him). Hubby was surprised and said he didn't do anything and i asked then why is Mickey speaking Chinese? And he said, "Manala i tahu. It was English then dia keluar Chinese version pulak alternately". Yes, it was definitely funny because tak pasal2 hubby kena marah and Aydin pun mengamuk because all of a sudden Mickey dia cakap cina :)) So we figured they repeat the same episode of Mickey Mouse Clubhouse (where Daisy lost her sheep) alternating English and Cantonese. Give it one week i am sure your child will be able to count in Cantonese from 1 to 10.
So the next morning we woke up, got ready for Disneyland and had breakfast of Tuna and bread (that was only me. Hubby went down to get some muffins for himself and Aydin). Arif had the bottled food for breakfast. I packed almost everything in the bag being all organized: Arif's lunch and dinner, bottled water, chocolates, cookies, Arif's milk, wet wipes, tissues and change of clothes for the kids. You are not allowed to bring in outside food into Disneyland. We bought our tix at the hotel counter while Aydin happily waited and sat at the TV area watching Mr. Bean. The tix cost us more than RM400 for 2 adults and 1 child (Arif free, Thank God!). Luckily the promo was buy 1 day pass get another day free so i guess it was worth the money. We took the Disney shuttle bus from the hotel to Disneyland and Aydin was so excited because we got onto "Mickey Bus" as he calls it.
The moment we arrived at Disneyland, Aydin buat perangai and wanted to sit on the stroller so i had to carry Arif on the carrier instead. Thank God for the carrier (and thanks to Jaz and Elin too), it helped my arm but it didn't help my shoulders tho because i had to practically carry a 10kg child for hours on my back! Nak amik gambar pun i had to face sideways or else tak nampak Arif :)
So the moment we entered the main entrance, it was Disney's trademark to have the big Mickey logo and train station greeting us. The plants that made up Mickey's face looked better in Annaheim and Florida's Disney though. Aydin was all excited when he saw Mickey but all the excitement was worn off when he saw the life size Mickey! He was so afraid and tried to make us leave the queue to meet and greet Mickey. He was pulling our hands and cried, "Aydin tak nak. Aydin tak nak". Luckily the line was short so by then it was already our turn and i told hubby to carry Aydin. At first he refused to look at Mickey and the cast crew comforted him by giving stickers (the gave away loads of stickers!). We finally managed to take pictures with Mickey Mouse (with my side profile of course so that Arif is included) and i managed to persuade Aydin to kiss Mickey's nose just to show him that it is ok and Mickey is harmless. He put the sticker he got on his right cheek (his favorite place to stick his stickers) and it almost covered half of his face. Everyone was looking at him and some of the kids wanted to do it as well.
Then we stopped by one of the stores to check out the Disney items and Aydin saw a shelf full of Lightning Mcqueen (say it like it is in the movie). He quickly gathered 2 armful of Disney Cars toys and was still admiring whatever is left on the shelf. I wanted to get the boys the signature Mickey Mouse hat with their names embroided on it but Aydin insisted that we get his Cars as well. Oh well, i figured this will not end until i get him a set so that was what i did. I bought a bag full of Cars characters i.e: Lightning Mcqueen, Sheriff, Mater, Luigi and Red later to find out that it was the bath toys and not even the plastic ones for RM60!
Then we quickly continued our journey on Main Street and off to Tomorrowland where Aydin enjoyed his space ride, car ride and also the squirting space land where he drenched himself with water squirted from the "Aliens" and "Spaceships". Luckily it was hot and sunny day so it didn't take a long to dry himself up under the hot sun. Later he saw a kid having a big candy floss so i thought, what the heck. Spoil him and get him one just for the sake of it. The Candy Floss cost me RM10 but it tasted much better than the ones we get here in Malaysia (obviously). The small mineral water bottle cost about RM6/bottle, believe it or not! Aydin was so awed by the candy floss and he only took a bite and wanted to just hold it instead of eating it. After 5 mins the floss shrunk and it was almost everywhere on Aydin's face and mummy's hand (because mummy was trying to steal some floss from Aydin). Mummy and Ayah was practically "stealing" the floss from Aydin before it goes bad and nobody wants to eat it anymore.
We had lunch under a tree and it was only plain fish burgers with tartar sauce. How pathetic can that be? We didn't have much choice and we can't bring our own food so fish burger it was. Aydin had his favorite fries. My packed Oreo's tasted so good that time compared to the fish burger and Aydin had most of it.
Our journey continues in Fantasyland with picture sessions with Winnie the Pooh, Minnie Mouse, Goofy, Pluto and another Mickey Mouse. We didn't get to take picture with Buzz Lightyear because Aydin was still afraid then. We were lucky because it was a Wednesday, the crowd was not so crazy and we only had to queue max 5 mins the most to get onto a ride or photo session with the characters. We did not find Donald Duck though and we missed Chip n Dale. We saw the Parade at 3.30p.m and it was so colorful and fun though most of it was in Chinese. We waited for the fireworks at 8.00p.m and Aydin only caught the last few minutes of it because he was asleep.
As for dinner, we wanted to have Shrimp fried rice and hubby excitedly went to the counter to order before noticing that there was a fine line of description underneath the menu that says with Pork Sausages. We were so frustrated because it was a pre-prepared food so we didn't get to order Shrimp fried rice but ended up with Vegetable Noodle and rice. Hubby was sad because he does not really fancy vegetables and he didn't get his shrimp fried rice.
We covered almost everythiing except for Adventureland. We planned to watch the Lion king show the next day and ride on the river boat too. We were all worn out by the time we reached the hotel room. Arif and Aydin fell asleep almost instantly.
Honey, I am hommmmeee!!!
Yes, we are finally back from our 5 days trip to Hong kong to visit Mickey and the gang and still maid-less. The Hong Kong trip was another chaotic trip with Aydin and a mind of his own and we lost a stroller. Yes, we lost the red and black 3 1/2 year old stroller that has served us tremendously well and almost everywhere. First, let's talk about the maid as it is not a very long story. The agent promised us a "tomorrow" and that tomorrow never come until today even after we are back from our trip. He compensated us with a temp maid while waiting for the tomorrow to come with a new maid for us. Just hope we get a good and reliable one.
Now, the story of our Hong Kong trip to meet Mickey Mouse and the gang:
Day 1
We had to wake up very early in the morning because our flight was at 7.00 a.m. I was not very happy to wake the kids at this hour but we didn't really have much choice. Arif was cranky so i only managed to change his diapers and clothes. Aydin was another challenge but i managed to give him a short bath and dressed him up while the taxi was waiting for us outside. I only had around 3 hours of sleep because i was busy packing.
At the airport, Aydin insisted on riding his Trunki. Everyone was looking at our new green Trunki as it is not a very common in Malaysia. It was a worth money spending as Aydin was occupied and proud of his Trunki. We even had his change of clothes, snacks and drinks in the Trunki. As soon as we board the plane, Aydin was so excited and kept looking outside the window: "Mummy, aewo-pwane. Look Mummy Aewo-pwane".
More stories coming soon...